Monthly Archives: June 2012
Once again…nail on head…
If ignorance is bliss, then denial must be nirvana. (I hope that no one has ever said that…seems like a quote, but I couldn’t tell you who so for now it’s mine.)
Today, like no other day ever in my life, I understand why people choose to ignore any and all truths staring them right in the face. I understand why people choose to create fantasy worlds that only they live in, and never leave. I understand why instead of experiencing Jesus and His church, folks would much rather create who he is outta the left over puzzle pieces they have strewn around in their brain.
None of it is real. By any stretch of even the most creative imagination. Yet, if you try to take yourself, them, or God out of the box they’ve built, they will try to off you. Literally.
Being honest and transparent for the sake of healing, repentance, and freedom seems akin to suicide. In the truth, you can kill off all those places that have left you broken and in desperate pain for however long. But you will also be opening yourself up for other people, especially those who aren’t supposed to, to try to kill you too. Their judgments, their lack of compassion, their quiet opinions of just how bad you are.
But keep your integrity. Stay true. Stay honest. Because most of the time, those same folk are just floating down that river in Egypt and can’t admit it.
This is da sho’ nuff real!
Sometimes I just want to quit, but not just quit: like completely explode and flip tables and throw office supplies and kick over the water dispenser and tell the jerk co-worker why his existence is unnecessary and go fricking buckwild down the hallway yelling obscene profanities at everyone who dares to step into my zone.
I play this over carefully in my head, premeditating my furious wrath to the most miniscule detail down to making the universal gesture at the exit for “You guys are Number One.” I’m a meteorologist charting out the path of a hurricane, except I’m laughing about it like some evil scientist in his basement.
Maybe that’s not healthy. Am I alone in this? Because I sense I’m not the only Drama Queen here.
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“Because this is truly the best part: These life-altering changes
are an amazing legacy, a gift to every daughter and granddaughter—
those who grace your life today and those yet to be born.” – Suze Orman, Women & Money
Who woulda thunk it? A nice little nugget in the beginning pages of a financial empowerment book. Granted, her book is directed at teaching women to be financially smart, but she speaks to a much deeper concept – that of not settling.
How deep would it be if we recognized the truth of her above statement in every mistake we made? If we realized that the lessons to be gleaned from every experience wasn’t for us, but for the generations AFTER us? That every time you functioned in fear, worry, anxiety, or complacency that you were cutting off a major growth opportunity for someone else?
“Life-altering changes” are simply moves of faith. When you walk, eyes open, into unknown and un-chartered territory. When all you know for certain is the beginning, you have no idea what the middle will hold, but you believe in the end. That sounds like it’d make for a much more interesting story than the one that anyone can write. Title: “I did what everyone else did when everyone else did it cause it was the safest thing to do and there was no risk involved, plus everyone was doing it so it must have been right although I was miserable because there had to be more.”
Personally, I’d rather tell my future kids an impactful and effectual story rather than a typical one that they can hear anywhere.
I really had to think about that “passion” vs. “gift” thing. I’m passionate about a couple things and would work hard at them and do them for free. But my GIFT, on the other hand, flows like water when I respect it. Ain’t no real work in it if I’m honest.
Everyone has a gift in some aspect. You were given it before you were even here. Let me reiterate…you. were. given. it.
You can squander it. You can ignore it. Or you can grow it, fertilize it, expand it.
You may never have considered it because it just seemed so natural.
What kinda doofus doesn’t like getting gifts? I have a feeling that one day we’ll start seeing Christmas marketing start in August/September simply because of the idea of “gift giving”. Buy the kids school clothes and pick up a present. Or just maybe that’s a clue as to why. We run around grabbing what we can off of shelves and racks and off of floors in hopes that the recipient will appreciate it – and possibly reciprocate (in kind…cause who wants less than they’ve given?). Some people won’t accept gifts for just that reason. Because there seems to be a string attached. If Petey gives me a gift, won’t I have to give him one back? Oooh noooo…I don’t think so…what does he want from me anyway?
And that’s a lot of reason as to why we won’t operate in our gifts. Because if I actually start using this thing, I’ll be responsible for something. Anything. “It’s my gift…why do I have to share it with YOU? Mine! Mine! Mine!”
Our church started a bible study called “His Law and His Grace” using the Ten Commandments. Maybe another day I’ll get into the Hebrew name of those and how the word law is really not the most fitting translation.
When we become believers, all of a sudden we start to see how everything wrong unfolded in our lives. We read and study and get more dejected because we see this crazy list of “don’t dos” that we’ve done most of already! Try as we might to live up to everything listed but there’s no way. No one can, but we keep trying and suddenly it’s like our hands, lives, souls get tied to this idea of never being able to come from under that weight. So we either look back and say what we had wasn’t so bad and give up on the walk; OR we live in perpetual misery that we’ll never get it right. Neither is true or what He planned when he was talking then.
As I started going through Exodus 20:1-17, I got stuck on what God said even before he started ripping off the commandments!